"When I have seen children mismanaged I have said, Give them to me. And I have taken child after child, and I tried to fashion them after Christ’s order. I never found it did much good to pound them. {Ms77-1910.16} Once I thought I would have to punish the child, but I took her in the room with me, and I said, We will pray. After I had prayed, I asked her if she would like to say a few words to the Lord. I told her that it was the first time that I had brought anything in my hand with which to correct her, and that I did not want to use it this time. I said, Can you just ask the Lord to forgive you for what you have done? The lips were opened, and the moment the lips were opened the heart was broken, and there she wept and wept. Could I have struck a blow to that child? I told her, I am so thankful that I did not have to correct you. It hurts me worse than it does you. If you will try to do right, we will take you out in the fields where you can pick the flowers, and we will kneel down there and pray all together. {Ms77-1910.17}] When there are evil traits in your children’s characters, you are to talk with them and pray with them and seek to soften their dispositions, and you will in doing this soften your own dispositions." {Ms77-1910.20}
"Fathers and mothers, never quarrel with your children or provoke them to anger. Train them to obey you to the letter. I know by experience that this can be done without provocation. I have taken charge of children that were said to be incorrigible, and at the close of the year I have told them that I should not ask them to obey me any better in the year to come than they had obeyed me during the past year. In dealing with them, never would I allow them to gain an advantage over me by causing me to lose my temper. I knew that the enemy wanted me to become angry when the children disobeyed; but I would always say to them: “Children, I shall leave you now to think over your course of action. In your excited, angry state of mind you are not prepared to see things in the right light. Tonight before you sleep we will talk the matter over together.” Thus I gave them opportunity for calm reflection. When night came and we met together for worship, they were ready to break down and cry like babies. They would ask my forgiveness, and then we would kneel and ask God’s forgiveness." {Ms57-1902.39}
"We should pray to God much more than we do. There is great strength and blessing in praying together in our families, with and for our children. When my children have done wrong, and I have talked with them kindly and then prayed with them, I have never found it necessary after that to punish them. Their hearts would melt in tenderness before the Holy Spirit that came in answer to prayer." { 2SAT 301.4 }
"I have adopted children in order that they might be trained in right lines. Instead of punishing them when they did wrong, I would hold out inducements to them to do right. One was in the habit of throwing herself on the floor if she could not have her own way. I said to her, “If you will not lose your temper once today, your Uncle White and I will take you in the carriage, and we will have a happy day in the country. But if you throw yourself on the floor once, you will forfeit your right to the pleasure.” I worked in this way for these children, and now I feel thankful that I had the privilege of doing this work." {Ms95-1909.11}
"I never allowed my children to see mother out of patience. I did not try to correct them until I knew that I had perfect control over all my feelings of impatience. When I approached them with voice and spirit subdued, I gained their confidence. We are to learn meekness of spirit from the divine Master." {ST July 15, 1889, par. 9}